avoiding conflict

Most people who know me know how much I hate confrontation. I can discuss just about any issue and I can even get passionate about stuff, but if I sense that the 'discussion' is moving towards a fight, I back right off and don't look back.

People think it's weird that Vergil and I have never had a fight in our 7 years together. There are multiple reasons for that, but some of them are that a) we're communicators. We talk about stuff all the time and therefore don't typically have any miscommunications to fight about. b) We have very similar personalities. We think alike on most issues and those that we don't agree don't really affect our relationship anyway. c) I hate conflict. I get upset when other people fight, so you can fair bet that I avoid it in my own relationships.

All this is really a side bar to today's passage (Luke 6:36-38). It's still early, so I don't know if my thoughts are going to be very connected. Anyway, I shall ramble on. Today's passage is a bit of a mantra of mine. It's the one I refer to when I'm in especially sticky moral dilemmas such as homosexuality. It's a good out - 'do not judge and you will not be judged; do not condemn and you will not be condemned.' This passage saves me from conflict by allowing me not to take a firm stand on a number of people-related issues.

However, as I think about it, I realize that I'm guilty of not applying this mantra to much of my everyday life. I judge people all the time based on what they wear, their hairstyle, the peculiar angle of their nose and the way they behave in the 2 seconds I observe or hear about. "That girl is a ho." "That guy is a dude." "Sports commentators make me want to cut my ears off."

I'm two faced. I only use this verse as a fail-safe for avoiding conflict. I don't always apply it to the rest of my life. I need to guard my mouth and my thoughts to be sure that I am truly being merciful. That I am withholding judgement and condemnation. That I am seeking to forgive, even if it means letting that guy cut me off without flipping him the bird.

And, as always, Jesus' teaching is harder than it first appears. It seems fine and easy in theory but to put it into honest practice is a whole other ball game. But you know what? I want that 'good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over,' poured into my lap.

"If you give, you begin to live...you begin...you get the world!"